1
00:00:02,085 --> 00:00:04,087
[theme music playing]
2
00:00:53,595 --> 00:00:55,597
[upbeat music playing]
3
00:01:04,731 --> 00:01:06,233
[all laughing]
4
00:01:06,316 --> 00:01:08,944
- [indistinct chatter]
- [party blower honks]
5
00:01:16,743 --> 00:01:19,078
Now I know why I kept running out of yarn.
6
00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:21,956
Don't worry, darling, I'll grow into it.
7
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Well, listen, if you don't, uh, you could
always sell it to Wilt Chamberlain.
8
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- [Moe laughs]
- That's my sweater!
9
00:01:27,170 --> 00:01:28,212
Come here. Sit down.
10
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- [party blower honks]
- And now, my dear brother-in-law,
11
00:01:33,260 --> 00:01:36,179
some special birthday goodies
we all put together.
12
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The envelopes, please.
13
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I get an Oscar for being 65?
14
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Two tickets for the opening game
of the New York Mets.
15
00:01:44,605 --> 00:01:48,734
And, Moe, if you want company,
Walt just loves basketball.
16
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Baseball, Amy.
That's what they play. Baseball.
17
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[all laughing]
18
00:01:53,697 --> 00:01:57,034
Oh, Walt, you...
you take your games so seriously.
19
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A ball game is a ball game. [giggles]
20
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Sightseeing tour around Manhattan
with the girl of your choice.
21
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Pussycat, I could make
my choice right now.
22
00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:13,216
Hey, hey, knock that off.
Look at him, the delicatessen Don Juan.
23
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But look what you got instead.
24
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Moe, I have here two tickets
to the spiciest show in town.
25
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From you, Father Mike?
26
00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:23,644
That's right,
and I want a full report on this,
27
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being as I'm not going myself.
28
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A block of tickets for you
and a companion to Lincoln Center.
29
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And, uh, to help you get around
to all those places,
30
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a pair of super-duper
Roller Derby speedsters! Hey!
31
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[all exclaiming]
32
00:02:41,370 --> 00:02:44,498
Oh, such a wonderful family.
33
00:02:45,207 --> 00:02:46,667
Such treasures.
34
00:02:47,793 --> 00:02:51,004
But tell me, who's got time
to go to do all these things?
35
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You do.
36
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Because from now on, we want you
to start taking things a little easier.
37
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That's right. All your life,
you've been working so hard.
38
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Now you deserve some time off.
39
00:03:01,723 --> 00:03:04,893
[chuckling] You mean like retirement?
40
00:03:04,976 --> 00:03:09,272
Did anybody hear me say the word "retire"?
We just want you to take it easy.
41
00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:10,982
Right.
42
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You twisted my arm. Thank you.
43
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Thank you for making me so happy.
44
00:03:19,907 --> 00:03:22,369
I always cry at birthday parties.
45
00:03:22,452 --> 00:03:24,454
Amy, you cry when you watch Sesame Street.
46
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Oh...
47
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- Come on!
- [Bernie] Let's get some of this cake.
48
00:03:29,459 --> 00:03:30,961
- Hey!
- Right on.
49
00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:33,964
Let's get these candles lit
so Uncle Moe can blow them out.
50
00:03:34,047 --> 00:03:35,382
[tutting]
51
00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:37,551
I got a better idea.
52
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With all those candles,
I'll light them and you blow them out.
53
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[exciting music playing]
54
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Hey, hey, hey.
What do you think you're doing?
55
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Dancing the cha-cha with the broom.
56
00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:54,818
No sweeping.
57
00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:56,111
The place is a mess.
58
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What mess? I've seen operating rooms
dirtier than this.
59
00:03:59,781 --> 00:04:02,617
Moe, did you forget
what we said last night?
60
00:04:02,701 --> 00:04:07,664
Sophie, after three glasses
of champagne, I forgot last night.
61
00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:11,334
Moe, we told you we want you
to take it easy. Have fun.
62
00:04:11,418 --> 00:04:13,420
Not work every day of your life.
63
00:04:13,503 --> 00:04:16,839
You got a whole drawer
full of tickets to use.
64
00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:20,469
Now go! Go, go. Enjoy.
65
00:04:20,552 --> 00:04:21,887
[chuckles]
66
00:04:24,347 --> 00:04:26,349
- [somber music playing]
- [sighs]
67
00:04:27,476 --> 00:04:30,771
Moe, my boy, I think
they're trying to tell you something.
68
00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:36,401
And what they're trying to tell you,
I don't think you wanna hear.
69
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[Moe narrating] Four o'clock.
I can't even go home.
70
00:04:41,865 --> 00:04:47,412
They'd think I wasn't having a good time.
And you know what? They'd be right.
71
00:04:50,832 --> 00:04:51,875
Evening.
72
00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:59,508
Seven o'clock.
Have a busy day, Mr. Playboy?
73
00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:03,595
Only if you count the Statue of Liberty
as one of the Bunnies.
74
00:05:09,935 --> 00:05:11,853
I haven't seen Uncle Moe around.
75
00:05:11,937 --> 00:05:14,523
Oh, he's out having a good time somewhere.
76
00:05:14,606 --> 00:05:16,024
Really enjoying himself, huh?
77
00:05:16,107 --> 00:05:18,777
Oh, yeah. I've never seen him happier.
78
00:05:18,860 --> 00:05:20,529
[Moe] A good time?
79
00:05:20,612 --> 00:05:24,157
When a man takes the deluxe tour
to the top of the Empire State Building
80
00:05:24,241 --> 00:05:27,869
and wants to jump off,
it's time to stop having such a good time
81
00:05:27,952 --> 00:05:29,371
and start working again.
82
00:05:29,454 --> 00:05:31,039
They'll understand.
83
00:05:31,998 --> 00:05:33,291
[Moe exclaims]
84
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I'll just explain
how a young man of 65 feels
85
00:05:38,296 --> 00:05:40,464
and I'll be back behind the counter again.
86
00:05:40,924 --> 00:05:42,425
[whistling]
87
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Uh, sorry, we're closed.
88
00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:48,431
"We're" closed?
89
00:05:49,307 --> 00:05:51,351
Since when you been closing up?
90
00:05:51,434 --> 00:05:53,144
Since this afternoon when they hired me.
91
00:05:53,228 --> 00:05:55,939
I see. They needed help, huh?
92
00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:58,149
Young-blooded help.
93
00:05:59,150 --> 00:06:00,277
Hey, where you goin'?
94
00:06:01,152 --> 00:06:05,532
I'm not sure, young man.
May take me a little while to find out.
95
00:06:05,615 --> 00:06:07,617
[dramatic music playing]
96
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:21,172
Sam. Hurry. Come out here!
97
00:06:22,339 --> 00:06:24,342
What's the emergency?
I almost cut my ear off.
98
00:06:24,426 --> 00:06:26,094
[sobbing] It's terrible!
99
00:06:26,177 --> 00:06:28,053
Here, let me read it before you drown it.
100
00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:31,725
"My darling sister and her husband.
101
00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:38,481
I know you both meant well, but I am not
ready yet to retire from the human race.
102
00:06:38,565 --> 00:06:41,526
For me, 65 is a beginning, not an end.
103
00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:45,988
So I am leaving you this note
to let you know I am leaving.
104
00:06:46,948 --> 00:06:48,950
Please give my broom
105
00:06:49,034 --> 00:06:52,329
and best wishes
to your new young-blooded helper.
106
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:55,123
- Moe."
- What does it mean?
107
00:06:55,206 --> 00:06:59,002
It means,
as some of our friends might say,
108
00:06:59,085 --> 00:07:00,962
that we slipped Uncle Moe a downer.
109
00:07:01,713 --> 00:07:03,005
What does that mean?
110
00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:07,010
Well, I... I guess Uncle Moe wasn't ready
to be put out to pasture yet.
111
00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:10,472
Who's putting him out to pasture?
We just want him to take it easy.
112
00:07:10,555 --> 00:07:13,099
To Uncle Moe, taking it easy
is working eight hours a day
113
00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:14,559
instead of his customary 12.
114
00:07:14,643 --> 00:07:17,395
But this is crazy.
He couldn't take it easy at 65?
115
00:07:17,479 --> 00:07:19,981
Dad! Look, I guess
you just don't tell a man
116
00:07:20,065 --> 00:07:23,944
he's in the twilight of his life
when he thinks it's mid-afternoon.
117
00:07:24,027 --> 00:07:27,906
Afternoon, twilight. For me it's midnight
and I'm having a nervous breakdown.
118
00:07:27,989 --> 00:07:30,200
Ma, sit down, relax, will you?
119
00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:32,160
I'm sure he'll be fine, Mother Steinberg.
120
00:07:32,243 --> 00:07:34,829
Yeah, he's a grown man.
He can take care of himself.
121
00:07:34,913 --> 00:07:37,707
In New York?
Ten thousand missing every year.
122
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People come from all over
just to get missing.
123
00:07:40,210 --> 00:07:43,546
Ma, you wanted him to have a good time.
Maybe he's gone out to have one.
124
00:07:43,630 --> 00:07:45,423
I don't know,
how can you worry about a guy
125
00:07:45,507 --> 00:07:47,133
who spends his afternoon
with the New York Mets
126
00:07:47,217 --> 00:07:49,052
and his evening at Lincoln Center?
127
00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:51,721
You know, Bernie? Maybe you're right.
128
00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:54,516
I always said you should've been a doctor.
129
00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:56,935
A psychiatrist, even.
130
00:07:59,521 --> 00:08:03,817
Ten thousand people missing a year?
Come on, where'd you get that figure?
131
00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:07,404
My mother, the almanac.
But, uh, suppose it's true?
132
00:08:08,113 --> 00:08:11,783
It... it looks like Uncle Moe has run away
from home.
133
00:08:12,450 --> 00:08:16,413
Honey, "run away from home" seems hardly
the phrase befitting a man his age.
134
00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:20,458
Well, I happen to agree, but, uh, you seem
pretty casual about something that...
135
00:08:21,209 --> 00:08:23,003
Look, Michael, it might be serious.
136
00:08:23,795 --> 00:08:27,632
Unless he's being casual
because he knows it isn't serious.
137
00:08:29,968 --> 00:08:30,969
Aha.
138
00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:35,306
However, if, uh, Uncle Moe had been here,
139
00:08:35,390 --> 00:08:38,309
of course Michael would've been sworn
to a vow of secrecy,
140
00:08:38,393 --> 00:08:39,436
uh, wouldn't you, Mike?
141
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:44,024
Uncle Moe wasn't here, was he, Michael?
142
00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:47,402
- I'm sorry. I can't answer that.
- He was here.
143
00:08:48,653 --> 00:08:51,655
Now, if Uncle Moe was here,
144
00:08:51,740 --> 00:08:54,826
he didn't say anything about looking
for a job, did he?
145
00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:56,244
Bridget!
146
00:08:56,327 --> 00:08:59,164
- He's looking for a job.
- [laughs]
147
00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:01,458
Have you ever thought
of going to work for the CIA?
148
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,585
But where's he staying?
That's gonna be a tough one.
149
00:09:03,668 --> 00:09:06,421
Well, not for you, apparently.
You're batting 1,000.
150
00:09:06,504 --> 00:09:08,173
Well, he could be staying at a hotel.
151
00:09:08,256 --> 00:09:10,216
Yeah. You're... you're now batting 500.
152
00:09:10,300 --> 00:09:13,344
Moe wouldn't stay at a hotel.
He'd stay someplace, you know, like the Y.
153
00:09:13,428 --> 00:09:14,846
With the YMCA!
154
00:09:15,764 --> 00:09:18,349
You are now batting 250 and dropping fast.
155
00:09:18,433 --> 00:09:19,893
The YMHA.
156
00:09:19,976 --> 00:09:22,227
[dramatic music playing]
157
00:09:26,274 --> 00:09:28,109
[both] The YMHA.
158
00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:33,198
Oh, Michael, thanks for your help.
159
00:09:33,948 --> 00:09:37,035
It was nothing.
At least, it was supposed to be nothing.
160
00:09:39,953 --> 00:09:42,207
[mellow music playing]
161
00:09:50,048 --> 00:09:51,216
[Amy] Walt?
162
00:09:52,300 --> 00:09:54,928
Oh, Walt, something terrible has happened.
163
00:09:55,011 --> 00:09:56,971
I know. I just missed the putt.
164
00:09:57,054 --> 00:09:59,224
Oh, no, no. I...
I didn't mean that. I meant...
165
00:09:59,307 --> 00:10:02,894
Well, it's something much more serious.
Walt, it's Moe.
166
00:10:02,977 --> 00:10:07,690
Now, he has quit the delicatessen
and left the Steinbergs.
167
00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:12,070
Well, frankly, Amy, I'm not surprised.
Bernie's people are born wanderers.
168
00:10:12,153 --> 00:10:14,948
And Moe just finally got his ticket
to wander.
169
00:10:15,573 --> 00:10:20,160
Yes, but he wandered
only as far as the YMHA.
170
00:10:21,913 --> 00:10:24,207
I... I think he just wants to feel wanted.
171
00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:25,500
Well, I tell you what we'll do, Amy.
172
00:10:25,583 --> 00:10:28,128
Why don't we send him
a "feel wanted" card?
173
00:10:29,420 --> 00:10:31,548
But, Walt, can't you do something?
174
00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:36,219
I mean, like, well, can't...
can't you get him a job or something?
175
00:10:36,302 --> 00:10:38,054
No. I don't know how, Amy.
176
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:41,224
I deal in conglomerates, not knishes.
177
00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:44,309
Walt, he's family.
178
00:10:46,062 --> 00:10:48,648
All right, darling.
I'll give it some thought.
179
00:10:49,982 --> 00:10:52,777
- [alarm rings]
- Oh, darn it. I'm late!
180
00:10:52,861 --> 00:10:54,529
I've got to have lunch at the club.
181
00:10:54,612 --> 00:10:56,990
I've got a massage at 2:00,
and I gotta have my haircut and manicure
182
00:10:57,073 --> 00:10:58,825
before my 4:00 squash game.
183
00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:01,535
Oh, dear. Well, look,
I'll try to think of something.
184
00:11:01,619 --> 00:11:04,122
You've got such a busy day.
185
00:11:06,708 --> 00:11:11,087
So my son the psychiatrist turns out
to be my son, the detective.
186
00:11:11,796 --> 00:11:14,883
Yeah, well, as long as it doesn't turn out
to be your son, the stool pigeon.
187
00:11:14,966 --> 00:11:18,636
Oh, hello. Will you connect me
with Mr. Moe Plotnick's room, please?
188
00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:21,181
Don't worry. Leave it to your father,
the diplomat.
189
00:11:21,264 --> 00:11:22,765
I'll handle it just right.
190
00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:25,434
Yes? What?
191
00:11:26,227 --> 00:11:27,352
Oh, thank you.
192
00:11:28,688 --> 00:11:29,856
He checked out.
193
00:11:30,815 --> 00:11:33,651
Well? What do we do now,
Mr. Hawaii Five-O?
194
00:11:36,321 --> 00:11:38,030
Charles, don't you worry.
195
00:11:38,114 --> 00:11:41,409
I just know that your father's
gonna have a speedy recovery.
196
00:11:41,492 --> 00:11:44,370
Thank you, madam.
I do hate leaving you short-handed.
197
00:11:44,453 --> 00:11:47,498
No, that's perfectly all right.
We'll just get along fine.
198
00:11:47,582 --> 00:11:49,500
I have an idea in mind.
199
00:11:49,583 --> 00:11:51,502
Very well. Thank you, madam.
200
00:11:51,586 --> 00:11:55,215
- Goodbye, Charles.
- [phone ringing]
201
00:11:55,298 --> 00:11:57,300
[mellow music playing]
202
00:12:02,096 --> 00:12:03,097
Hello?
203
00:12:03,932 --> 00:12:06,309
Oh, Walt, I'm so glad you called.
204
00:12:06,392 --> 00:12:10,521
I've been thinking about Moe and I had
some of my people check into it.
205
00:12:10,605 --> 00:12:13,107
Uh, there just aren't
any suitable openings.
206
00:12:13,191 --> 00:12:15,693
Apparently he's too old
to be a messenger boy
207
00:12:15,777 --> 00:12:17,487
and he's too young
to be chairman of the board.
208
00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:19,864
Well, look, Walt, I have an idea.
209
00:12:19,948 --> 00:12:23,034
Oh, fine, darling.
Anything you wanna do is fine with me.
210
00:12:23,117 --> 00:12:25,787
- I'll see you later.
- Oh, thank you, dear.
211
00:12:26,955 --> 00:12:29,082
He says it's fine with him.
212
00:12:30,792 --> 00:12:34,963
In that case,
I am at your disposal, madam.
213
00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:37,924
[lighthearted music playing]
214
00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:46,266
[doorbell rings]
215
00:12:46,349 --> 00:12:48,351
[mellow music playing]
216
00:12:52,397 --> 00:12:54,232
Please come in, sir.
217
00:12:55,024 --> 00:12:57,110
- Fitzgerald residence?
- Certainly, sir.
218
00:12:57,193 --> 00:13:00,405
- Would you please tell Mrs. Fitzgerald--?
- May I take your coat, please?
219
00:13:00,488 --> 00:13:01,489
What?
220
00:13:01,572 --> 00:13:03,408
- Your coat.
- Oh, all right.
221
00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:06,910
Now, whom shall I say is calling?
222
00:13:06,995 --> 00:13:08,078
The laundryman.
223
00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:17,463
[doorbell rings]
224
00:13:23,761 --> 00:13:27,223
Oh, Charles, I'm sorry.
I forgot that key again.
225
00:13:27,307 --> 00:13:30,559
I don't know what's happening
with my memory these days.
226
00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:33,438
- Hello, darling.
- Hello, dear.
227
00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:34,522
Charles?
228
00:13:35,648 --> 00:13:37,232
I'm Amy.
229
00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:40,320
I know who you are. It's who he is.
230
00:13:41,029 --> 00:13:42,238
He's Moe.
231
00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:46,159
I know who he is. I wanna know why he is.
232
00:13:46,242 --> 00:13:48,660
Good evening, Mr. Fitzgerald.
233
00:13:48,745 --> 00:13:51,956
"Mr. Fi--" What's going on, Amy?
234
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:55,668
Where is Charles?
235
00:13:55,752 --> 00:13:59,380
It was an emergency.
He's at his father's bedside.
236
00:13:59,464 --> 00:14:02,216
Well, if he doesn't get back here,
I'm going to have someone at mine.
237
00:14:02,300 --> 00:14:05,303
Now, look, it's perfectly fine
for Moe to stay as a guest.
238
00:14:05,386 --> 00:14:09,015
Oh, but, Walt, he's much too proud
to stay as a guest.
239
00:14:09,098 --> 00:14:11,726
Oh, Walt, please,
it's only for a little while.
240
00:14:11,809 --> 00:14:13,770
Just till he gets settled. Please?
241
00:14:13,852 --> 00:14:15,396
- Amy, there's no...
- Oh, Walt!
242
00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:17,857
[crying] Why is it every time...
I mean, you always say the same--
243
00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:20,193
- All right, Amy.
- [calmly] Oh, thank you, dear.
244
00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:22,528
Surprised, huh, Walt?
245
00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:25,073
"Flabbergasted" is a little more like it.
246
00:14:25,907 --> 00:14:30,036
If I have ever needed an excuse
to have a martini, that is it.
247
00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:31,871
Join me, Moe?
248
00:14:31,954 --> 00:14:35,375
I never drink while I'm on duty,
Mr. Fitzgerald.
249
00:14:35,458 --> 00:14:38,378
Well, you're off duty now,
so how about it?
250
00:14:38,461 --> 00:14:41,839
Mmm, thanks, Walt,
but I never drink off duty either.
251
00:14:41,923 --> 00:14:44,217
Oh, neither did Charles.
252
00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:47,553
Honestly, all you butlers are alike.
253
00:14:47,637 --> 00:14:50,848
Well, all we employers aren't.
254
00:14:50,932 --> 00:14:53,851
Excuse me, Mr. Fitzgerald,
but as your butler,
255
00:14:53,935 --> 00:14:56,104
I think I should be doing that.
256
00:14:57,146 --> 00:14:58,147
All right.
257
00:14:58,856 --> 00:15:01,984
I would like a very dry martini.
258
00:15:02,568 --> 00:15:04,821
One dry martini coming up.
259
00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:06,906
[suspenseful music playing]
260
00:15:16,791 --> 00:15:19,085
One gin, one vermouth.
261
00:15:20,753 --> 00:15:22,964
Moe, just a breath of vermouth!
262
00:15:23,047 --> 00:15:25,925
Mr. Fitzgerald,
you breathe the way you wanna,
263
00:15:26,008 --> 00:15:27,718
I'll breathe the way I wanna.
264
00:15:29,679 --> 00:15:31,389
[cheeky music playing]
265
00:15:37,979 --> 00:15:38,855
Moe, what are you doing?
266
00:15:39,814 --> 00:15:42,442
Walt, a little protein never hurt nobody.
267
00:15:51,701 --> 00:15:54,245
Am I glad we're closed. Huh!
268
00:15:54,328 --> 00:15:57,415
It was some rough day.
Even the tongue sandwiches were panting.
269
00:15:57,498 --> 00:16:00,960
If you don't mind, Sam,
I'm even too tired to laugh.
270
00:16:01,043 --> 00:16:03,421
Well, what happened to the boy you hired
in Uncle Moe's place?
271
00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:05,798
The boy we hired in Uncle Moe's place
272
00:16:05,882 --> 00:16:08,009
is the same boy we fired
in Uncle Moe's place.
273
00:16:08,092 --> 00:16:11,471
Instead of a 65-year-old man
who works like a 20-year-old kid,
274
00:16:11,554 --> 00:16:14,849
they wind up with a 20-year-old kid
who works like a 65-year-old man.
275
00:16:16,267 --> 00:16:20,521
Is there any rule that says
you can't rehire a 65-year-old uncle?
276
00:16:20,605 --> 00:16:23,357
For some very good reasons, sweetheart.
277
00:16:23,441 --> 00:16:27,403
We want him to relax. Take it easy.
Have some time off.
278
00:16:27,487 --> 00:16:29,864
- Ma...
- [Sam] And besides,
279
00:16:29,947 --> 00:16:31,449
we don't know how to get a hold of him.
280
00:16:35,912 --> 00:16:37,747
We're dining with the Armbrusters, Moe.
281
00:16:37,830 --> 00:16:39,290
Yes, we'll be out all evening.
282
00:16:39,373 --> 00:16:42,293
Ah, since it looks like rain,
that'll mean the raincoat,
283
00:16:42,376 --> 00:16:44,420
a muffler, and a pair of rubbers.
284
00:16:44,504 --> 00:16:48,007
We're taking the car, Moe.
I hardly think Amy will need all that.
285
00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:49,634
Those are for you.
286
00:16:49,717 --> 00:16:52,386
For Amy, I'll get the fur coat,
the fuzzy hat,
287
00:16:52,470 --> 00:16:55,890
the pair of galoshes,
and an umbrella, just in case.
288
00:16:57,266 --> 00:17:01,020
Amy, we haven't lost a butler.
We've gained a Jewish mother.
289
00:17:02,522 --> 00:17:04,523
[upbeat music playing]
290
00:17:11,196 --> 00:17:14,407
Oh, Walt, have you ever seen
such a breakfast?
291
00:17:14,492 --> 00:17:17,537
You got your choice.
Lox, whitefish, herring...
292
00:17:17,619 --> 00:17:20,039
This place is starting
to look like Marineland.
293
00:17:21,415 --> 00:17:22,542
Just a cup of coffee, Moe.
294
00:17:22,625 --> 00:17:26,837
Now, Walt, that's no way for a young,
healthy executive to start the day.
295
00:17:27,713 --> 00:17:29,965
Breakfast is the foundation.
296
00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:32,260
I'm not interested
in building a house, Moe.
297
00:17:32,343 --> 00:17:35,054
Okay, okay. You don't wanna eat, don't.
298
00:17:35,137 --> 00:17:36,180
Thanks, Moe.
299
00:17:36,263 --> 00:17:38,849
At least you could try
the cheese blintzes.
300
00:17:39,934 --> 00:17:41,852
I'll get you a touch of sour cream.
301
00:17:46,107 --> 00:17:48,025
[Walter] if I had anything, Amy,
302
00:17:49,151 --> 00:17:51,612
I would have Hilda scramble me
a couple of eggs.
303
00:17:52,196 --> 00:17:55,992
Oh, I wish I'd known that
before I let her go on her vacation.
304
00:17:56,617 --> 00:17:58,119
Vacation? Now?
305
00:17:58,703 --> 00:18:02,957
Well, it's only for while Moe is here.
It was her idea.
306
00:18:04,792 --> 00:18:05,792
Figures.
307
00:18:06,627 --> 00:18:09,213
Uncle Moe has been at your house?
308
00:18:09,297 --> 00:18:12,465
- Living and working?
- And driving me crazy.
309
00:18:15,303 --> 00:18:17,179
Well, your folks will be pleased
to know he's okay.
310
00:18:17,263 --> 00:18:20,224
Oh, he might be okay,
but I'm going downhill fast.
311
00:18:20,308 --> 00:18:22,518
And you can't tell Sophie and Sam
312
00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:25,354
because Moe made us promise
that we wouldn't say anything.
313
00:18:25,438 --> 00:18:30,026
It, uh, sounds to me like Uncle Moe's
not quite working out, huh?
314
00:18:30,109 --> 00:18:33,195
Let me put this
as diplomatically as possible.
315
00:18:33,279 --> 00:18:36,949
Bernie, your people make
great brain surgeons but lousy butlers.
316
00:18:37,032 --> 00:18:39,619
Well, listen, if he's not working out,
why don't you just fire him?
317
00:18:39,702 --> 00:18:41,244
Fire Moe?
318
00:18:41,329 --> 00:18:43,748
I mean, how do you tell someone
who's a member of your own family
319
00:18:43,830 --> 00:18:45,124
that he's doing terrible work?
320
00:18:45,207 --> 00:18:47,084
- Ooh.
- Yeah. How do you tell him?
321
00:18:47,167 --> 00:18:52,173
See, that's why I came over today.
I thought that maybe you'd tell him.
322
00:18:52,340 --> 00:18:54,842
- [mouths] Me?
- Daddy.
323
00:18:54,925 --> 00:18:57,470
Well, I don't know.
It sounds simple enough to me.
324
00:18:57,553 --> 00:19:00,973
My mother and father are going crazy
in the delicatessen without Uncle Moe
325
00:19:01,057 --> 00:19:03,309
and you're going crazy
at your house with him.
326
00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:06,061
So the thing to do is to get him back
from your house into the delicatessen
327
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:08,981
- without hurting his feelings, right?
- Right.
328
00:19:09,065 --> 00:19:10,608
Right. How do we do it?
329
00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:13,069
I haven't the vaguest idea.
330
00:19:15,279 --> 00:19:17,323
- [doorbell rings]
- [Walter] I'll get it.
331
00:19:20,368 --> 00:19:21,410
- Oh, hi.
- [Bernie] Hi.
332
00:19:21,494 --> 00:19:22,578
- [Walter] Come on in.
- [Bridget] Hi, Daddy.
333
00:19:22,662 --> 00:19:24,914
[Sam] Walt. Walt,
thank you for asking us over.
334
00:19:24,997 --> 00:19:26,707
- [Walter shushing]
- Amy asleep?
335
00:19:26,791 --> 00:19:29,835
- No, no. It's sort of a surprise.
- Somebody's birthday?
336
00:19:29,919 --> 00:19:33,047
- It's, uh, even better than that, Ma.
- What's better than birthdays?
337
00:19:33,130 --> 00:19:35,340
At my age, not having a birthday.
338
00:19:35,424 --> 00:19:36,759
[Sam] Amy!
339
00:19:36,842 --> 00:19:39,303
- How are you, dear?
- Oh, I'm so glad you could come, Sophie.
340
00:19:39,387 --> 00:19:42,138
- Hello, Sam.
- Well, how about a drink?
341
00:19:42,223 --> 00:19:44,684
- Don't mind if I do, Walt.
- Is that a new dress, Mother?
342
00:19:44,767 --> 00:19:48,104
Oh, I hope so. I just bought it today.
343
00:19:48,186 --> 00:19:51,523
- It's so pretty.
- Thank you.
344
00:19:51,607 --> 00:19:53,442
[Sophie] Did someone make it for you?
345
00:19:53,526 --> 00:19:56,445
[Amy] Oh, no, no, no.
I... I went to Bonwit's and bought it.
346
00:19:56,529 --> 00:19:58,989
It's, uh, they... they... Oh...
347
00:19:59,073 --> 00:20:01,325
Would you care for a drink, madam?
348
00:20:02,201 --> 00:20:04,869
Moe! Is that you?
349
00:20:04,954 --> 00:20:07,289
It's not Ruggles of Red Gap.
350
00:20:09,750 --> 00:20:11,419
Look, uh, why don't we sit down?
351
00:20:12,294 --> 00:20:15,005
- Yeah.
- Oh, yes. Come on and sit down.
352
00:20:15,089 --> 00:20:17,675
Where have you been? I was so worried.
353
00:20:17,758 --> 00:20:19,385
There was nothing to worry about.
354
00:20:19,468 --> 00:20:23,055
What are you doing in a monkey suit?
You look like you fell off a wedding cake.
355
00:20:27,101 --> 00:20:28,978
I think you look very handsome.
356
00:20:29,770 --> 00:20:31,439
- [Amy] Thank you.
- Thank you.
357
00:20:31,522 --> 00:20:34,525
Would somebody please tell me
what Moe's doing in that uniform?
358
00:20:34,608 --> 00:20:37,611
Well, it looks to me
like he's working. Here.
359
00:20:37,695 --> 00:20:38,988
You're a butler?
360
00:20:39,071 --> 00:20:42,742
No, you're a butler.
Of course I'm a butler!
361
00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:46,203
You've been here all this time
and you didn't call us and let us know?
362
00:20:46,287 --> 00:20:49,165
Frankly, I didn't think you cared.
363
00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:52,042
I haven't slept a wink since you left.
364
00:20:52,126 --> 00:20:55,296
You know you could've been mugged?
Run over by a horse?
365
00:20:55,379 --> 00:20:57,465
A piano could've fallen on you!
366
00:20:57,548 --> 00:21:00,092
Fine vacation you had planned for me.
367
00:21:00,718 --> 00:21:03,971
Sam... you look tired.
368
00:21:04,054 --> 00:21:07,141
Tired? Me? Never. I'm in the pink.
369
00:21:07,224 --> 00:21:08,559
That's your high blood pressure.
370
00:21:09,393 --> 00:21:14,523
Dad, uh, you know,
you really do look a bit tired.
371
00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:16,817
Yeah. Worn out.
372
00:21:16,901 --> 00:21:20,821
Oh, what's to be tired?
A hard day's work never hurt anybody.
373
00:21:21,489 --> 00:21:24,950
[Moe] So, uh,
how's your new helper working out?
374
00:21:25,034 --> 00:21:27,369
- Well, he's been--
- We fired him.
375
00:21:27,453 --> 00:21:30,705
It turned out the only thing
he knew how to cut was a deck of cards.
376
00:21:30,790 --> 00:21:34,210
Yeah. You know, there's nothing better
than experienced help.
377
00:21:34,292 --> 00:21:36,045
Sophie and I don't need help.
378
00:21:39,298 --> 00:21:41,090
When did you decide to become a butler?
379
00:21:41,175 --> 00:21:44,303
When a very kind lady
cared enough about a man
380
00:21:44,386 --> 00:21:47,263
who was thrown out in the street
in the prime of his life,
381
00:21:47,348 --> 00:21:49,350
cared enough to help him out.
382
00:21:49,433 --> 00:21:53,521
- Oh, wasn't that nice of her?
- It certainly was, Mother.
383
00:21:53,604 --> 00:21:55,105
I'm so grateful,
384
00:21:55,773 --> 00:21:58,484
I may be Walt's butler
for the rest of my life.
385
00:21:58,567 --> 00:22:02,404
Uh, just, uh... Wait a minute now.
I mean, don't be hasty, Moe.
386
00:22:03,155 --> 00:22:07,660
If Sophie and Sam want you to come back,
I won't stand in your way.
387
00:22:08,619 --> 00:22:11,664
Uncle Moe, really, uh,
you ought to think about it.
388
00:22:12,414 --> 00:22:14,166
I didn't hear any "come back."
389
00:22:14,250 --> 00:22:17,211
I didn't hear anybody say
he wanted to come back.
390
00:22:17,294 --> 00:22:19,004
[mellow music playing]
391
00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:28,305
Pardon me, Amy.
I appreciate this, all of this.
392
00:22:28,388 --> 00:22:29,557
I think we're gonna go home.
393
00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:31,267
- But, Sam--
- Home, Sophie.
394
00:22:31,350 --> 00:22:33,811
- Good night.
- Dad. Dad. Why don't you...?
395
00:22:33,894 --> 00:22:36,063
- [Sophie] Thank you for a lovely evening.
- [Bernie] Wait one minute.
396
00:22:41,819 --> 00:22:42,820
[door closes]
397
00:22:45,489 --> 00:22:46,574
Well, I'll tell you,
398
00:22:47,407 --> 00:22:50,119
it certainly wasn't the prodigal uncle
returned to the fold.
399
00:22:51,537 --> 00:22:53,664
I think our little plan was a disaster.
400
00:22:54,455 --> 00:22:57,626
Bernie, it wasn't a disaster.
It was a catastrophe!
401
00:23:08,304 --> 00:23:09,597
Moe!
402
00:23:09,680 --> 00:23:11,849
I'm glad to see
your eyesight is still good,
403
00:23:11,932 --> 00:23:14,184
- along with your stubbornness.
- What are you doing here?
404
00:23:14,268 --> 00:23:16,770
Somebody had to get
the breakfast orders started.
405
00:23:16,854 --> 00:23:18,439
What made you come back?
406
00:23:18,522 --> 00:23:22,401
When I heard you say you didn't need
any help, I knew you needed me.
407
00:23:22,484 --> 00:23:24,236
And I knew you would be back
408
00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:27,114
when you said, "I might be Walt's butler
for the rest of my life."
409
00:23:27,196 --> 00:23:28,699
You were that sure?
410
00:23:28,782 --> 00:23:32,578
So sure that I got up at six o'clock
and unlocked the front door.
411
00:23:34,788 --> 00:23:37,750
Sam, I'm glad to be back.
412
00:23:37,833 --> 00:23:39,209
I'm glad you're back.
413
00:23:39,710 --> 00:23:41,587
[both chuckle]
414
00:23:41,670 --> 00:23:42,755
Hey!
415
00:23:42,838 --> 00:23:45,590
What, are you gonna go to work,
or we gonna hug each other all day?
416
00:23:45,674 --> 00:23:47,676
I couldn't take this all day.
417
00:23:47,760 --> 00:23:49,261
You're standing on my foot!
418
00:23:57,102 --> 00:23:59,688
- We're closed.
- "Closed."
419
00:23:59,772 --> 00:24:03,025
- [chuckles]
- Oh, sorry. Reflex action.
420
00:24:03,108 --> 00:24:07,321
- It's about the only reflex I got left.
- Oh, it was a tough day, huh, Uncle Moe?
421
00:24:07,404 --> 00:24:10,032
Oh, you said it.
422
00:24:10,115 --> 00:24:13,160
I don't know who your mother and father
are catering for over there
423
00:24:13,243 --> 00:24:14,828
at the Friedman bar mitzvah.
424
00:24:14,912 --> 00:24:17,705
I think everyone in the neighborhood
was in here.
425
00:24:17,790 --> 00:24:21,042
Well, it looks like Papa Steinberg
took you out of retirement
426
00:24:21,126 --> 00:24:22,670
just in time to put you in the hospital.
427
00:24:22,753 --> 00:24:27,715
Mmm, boy, if there was only
some way I could ask for a day off
428
00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:30,135
without him stretching it into a lifetime.
429
00:24:31,220 --> 00:24:34,473
You know something, Uncle Moe?
There's always this.
430
00:24:36,225 --> 00:24:38,227
[Charleston music playing]
431
00:25:05,087 --> 00:25:07,673
[closing theme music playing]
432
00:25:07,723 --> 00:25:12,273
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